Battle

Battle between myself or I can say within myself, feeling lot of swings in this moment within myself. This battle is being fought for long time with no near treaty to conclude it, I wonder how this keeps on going and how this battle can be fought actually. Because I dont find any clarity in just fighting it for long, It makes me weary and tired. What I have thought right for long have went wrong suddenly, what seems to be right at this moment can't be made as right as time don't allow to do so. I am between the world of reality and perception,though  mind recognise the reality but not ready to accept it and heart aches for things beyond the reach, which culminates a state of confusion and frustation feeding more swings. If this is the life, then is this can be a proper way of living it, I don't think so. I need to rejuvanate myself, a nourishment for soul is must to keep me on my feet. I don't want to run in this life with haste, I just want to live a meaninful and satisfied life which means a lot to me. I need a real satisfied life but not a mere life which gives a feeling of satisfaction.